A Simple Method of Confession

CHAPTER VII

PREPARATION FOR CONFESSION

WE are going to confession. We have offended God by breaking His Commandments, and by so doing we have hurt our own souls. But thanks to His goodness and pity for our weakness, He is ready to forgive us and to make us well and strong again, no matter what we have done to hurt ourselves. “Come to Me, child,” He says to us tenderly, “and I will put you right again.” He promises. He does not say “perhaps.” And so we do not hope, but know for certain that we shall be put right if we do our part. For the sacraments always give grace to those who receive them worthily. We come to Him, then, joyfully, asking Him to do His part, and promising to do ours, which we know consists of four things:

I. We must heartily pray for grace to make a good confession.
II. We must carefully examine our conscience.
III. We must take time and care to make a good act of contrition.
IV. We must resolve by the help of God to renounce our sins and to begin a new life for the future.

I. WE MUST PRAY FOR GRACE TO MAKE A GOOD CONFESSION.

Because this is an important work and we can do no good work without the help of God’s grace. Because it is sometimes difficult to tell our sins. And because prayer is the means fixed by God for getting His help. “Ask,” He says, “and you shall receive.” You may say one of the hymns to the Holy Spirit,

or

I believe that there, behind the tabernacle door, is the Judge of the living and the dead, before whom I shall have to appear when I die, to give an exact account of my whole life. I believe that He will have to judge me then with strict justice, that there will be no time for confession and contrition then. O my Judge and my Savior, now while I have time, help me to find out my sins and to confess them with true sorrow, that I may stand without fear before You in the terrible hour of judgment.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for me a sinner now and at the hour of my death.

II. WE MUST CAREFULLY EXAMINE OUR CONSCIENCE.

If you go to confession frequently, and always examine your conscience at your night prayers, preparation for the Sacrament of Penance becomes very easy. You come to it with the work half done. Set to work briskly the minute you get into church, not looking about and wasting time in distractions, but beginning at once with the first of the four points. Follow some order in the arrangement of what you have to say—the ten commandments of God; the six precepts of the Church; the seven deadly sins; or—to cover the same ground in another way—your duties (1) to God; (2) to your neighbor; (3) to yourself. Your sins will thus remain in your memory, and when your examination is finished you will be able to leave them quietly and turn to your next point. Without an orderly arrangement, examination of conscience becomes difficult and wearisome, and even when it is finished, you will be running after your sins instead of thinking how to get rid of them. Your sins have been called to mind in the examination of conscience which, of course, you make every night, and a very short time will bring them before you now. For a month’s confession, eight or ten minutes, given in a businesslike way, to examination of conscience, is enough. Give the rest of the time, another ten minutes, to your contrition.

When we have not been to confession for some time, and even in our preparation for our weekly confession, we may sometimes find it useful to recall the places we have been in, and the persons we have met. This helps us to remember our sins. Any circumstance that changes the kind of a sin and makes it much worse, e.g., striking a parent, stealing anything belonging to a church, must be mentioned; and as far as we can we should say the number of times a sin has been committed.

After reasonable care has been given to examination of conscience, a sin forgotten is forgiven. Only, if a mortal sin were to come to mind later, we should have to confess it in our next confession, because every mortal sin must be confessed once.

Mortal means deadly. Three things are required to make a mortal sin: (1) grave matter; (2) full knowledge; (3) full consent.

(1) Grave matter—the sin must be a grievous sin, that is, the thought, word, action, or omission, must be something of very great importance, e.g., going to Communion after breaking the fast; stealing a large sum, or a small sum from a person extremely poor.

(2) Full knowledge—not done by mistake or before we knew clearly what we were about. The mind must think of the act and of its sinfulness at the time the act is done.

(3) Full consent—the act must deliberately agree to the temptation, whether of thought, word, or deed.

If there was not full knowledge, or full consent, but hesitation in rejecting the temptation, or only half consent, the sin is venial, not mortal, the soul is injured but not killed.

Venial means pardonable. This sin is so called because it is more easily pardoned than mortal sin. A lie of excuse, a small injury to our neighbor, do not turn the soul away from God like mortal sin, and therefore do not take away sanctifying grace. Nevertheless venial sin is a great evil and should be repented of sincerely. It displeases God, deprives the soul of many graces, weakens it by taking away its fear of offending God, and in this way often leads to mortal sin. No one ever comes to mortal sin, except through carelessness about venial sin. Each venial sin deserves its own temporal punishment, and will prolong our purgatory.

The law of God is that every mortal sin is to be confessed and absolved once. But it would not be safe to confess those sins only which we know for certain were mortal, because we are so apt to deceive ourselves. The only safe practice is to confess whatever is on our conscience and gives us trouble—certain things as certain, doubtful things as doubtful. Those who keep things back, who have secrets about their sins, or try to settle their doubts themselves, are very unhappy. They find confession a torture, they lose their peace and their confidence in God, and perhaps give up His service altogether.

We are not bound to confess our venial sins, but it is well to do so. A good practice is to pick out two or three of the chief ones and try to be sorry for them. This is better than spending much time in trying to remember them all.

EXAMINATION OF CONSCIENCE

I. DUTIES TO GOD.

• Confession. How long is it since my last?
• Did I do the four things by way of preparation?
• Did I leave out anything I ought to have told?
• Did I take time and care to make a good act of contrition?
• What was my purpose of amendment like?
• Did I say my penance carefully?

Communion. Did I make the usual acts before and after? And how?

• Prayers. “When I kneel down to pray do I remember that I am going to speak to God, and make at least a good start?
• Do I say my prayers in a hurry, or looking about all the time?
• Have I said my morning and night prayers, and without wilful distractions?
• Have I examined my conscience at night and made a real act of sorrow for my sins?
• Have I laughed or talked in church, or shown any irreverence during Mass or Benediction?
• Have I done anything to distract others at prayer?
• How do I listen to sermons or catechism?
• Have I said grace before and after meals as I ought?

Have I done or read anything likely to injure my faith?

Have I spoken with disrespect of God, or of holy things? Have I said bad words?

Have I stayed away from Mass on any Sunday or Holyday of Obligation? Have I been late on these days, or inattentive?

II. DUTIES TO MY PARENTS, NEIGHBOR AND SUPERIORS.

• Have I disobeyed parents, or any one else in authority over me?

• Have I provoked them, or shown disrespect in word or manner?

• Have I caused them great sorrow, or not helped them when they were poor, or old, or sick?

• Have I done what I was told at once, or been angry, or answered back?

• Have I been obstinate, sulky, or impertinent when told of my faults?

• Have I deceived my parents or those who are over me?

• Have I been in a passion?

• or kept up bad temper for a long time?

• Have I struck any one or quarrelled?

• Have I called people names, or in other ways provoked them?

• Have I wished harm to any one?

• Have I refused to forgive?

• Have I given bad example to any one by word or conduct?

• Or shared in any sin by proposing it, by defending it, by silence, or in any other way?

• Have I done anything to spite my parents, teachers, or companions?

Have I prevented others from studying, or working, or in any way doing their duty? Have I ridiculed others for doing good?

Have I given unnecessary trouble to parents or superiors?

• Have I stolen anything, or kept what did not belong to me, without trying to find the owner?

• Have I cheated in buying or selling?

• Have I destroyed, wasted, or wilfully damaged things, or in any other way been unjust in my dealings with my neighbor?

• Have I paid back everything I owed?

• Have I told lies, or lead others to tell them?

• (A lie of excuse that does not harm another is a venial sin.) Have I told any lie that I knew would be the cause of harm to another?

• (This is calumny, and may be a mortal sin.) Have I made known any one’s secret faults?

• (This is detraction.) Have I injured my neighbor’s character by speaking ill of him, or listened willingly to uncharitable conversation?

• Have I judged anyone rashly, that is, thought ill of him without sufficient cause?

• Have I made others quarrel, or made mischief by tale-bearing?

Note.—If I have sinned by calumny, detraction, or theft, I must repair as well as I can the harm I have done, and ask my confessor’s advice how to do it.

III. DUTIES TO MYSELF.

• Have I done anything wrong, by thought, word, or deed, against purity or modesty?
• Have I got others to do wrong?
• Have I gone with bad companions?
• or to dangerous amusements?
• Have I read bad books, or given them to others?

Note 1.—A bad thought which is not wilful is no sin, but not to try to put away the bad thought, to take pleasure in it, to consent to it—this is a sin.

Note 2.—Tale-telling to make mischief, or out of spite, is wrong. But if you know of any immodest conduct or conversation carried on, you must at once make it known to your parents, or those in authority, and not fear to be called “tell-tale.” If you neglect to do this, you may become answerable for such sins by concealment.

• Have I been vain of my abilities, my person, or my dress?

• Have I despised others?

• Have I been jealous of others, or annoyed when my companions were praised?

• Have I committed sin by eating or drinking too much?

• Have I, without leave, eaten meat on Friday, or on any day when it is forbidden?

• Have I kept the fasts of the Church unless lawfully dispensed?

Do I rise promptly in the morning, or am I lazy?

Have I been idle at my lessons? Have I stayed away from school or kept others away?

• Have I, through curiosity, read letters or anything I ought not to have read?
• What about the duties and occupations of my daily life—how have they been done—conscientiously, or carelessly?
• Have I wasted time in overmuch novel-reading, recreation, or in other ways?
• What is my chief fault, from which most of the others come—pride, anger, sloth, or what?
• Am I trying to conquer it?

Is there anything else I ought to confess, or as to which I want advice?

• For parents and those in authority.—Do I see that all under my charge are properly cared for as to soul and body?

• that they are sufficiently instructed, and have time for the discharge of their religious duties?

• Do I watch over their companions, amusements, and reading, and keep them as far as possible from idleness and occasion of sin?

• Do I set them a good example?

• Have I been excessive in reprehending them, or neglected to give them just reproof?

• For those who are employed.—Have I been disrespectful to my employers?

• Have I wasted or wilfully damaged their goods?

• or allowed others to do so?

• Have I stolen from them or given away their things without leave?

• Have I been idle or careless at my work, or not done what I was told to do?