Two Hundred and Third Subject. Susceptibility

Brother Philippe, Subjects for Particular Examen, 1870, pp. 326–327

To me it is a very small thing to be judged by you, or by human judgment....he that judgeth me is the Lord.—I. Cor. iv. 3.
Susceptibility is the unhappy inclination which rules over certain badly organized minds, and which leads them to be most frequently troubled about trifles, for a supposed want of respect, which generally has no other foundation than a badly-regulated self-love; a word said without design, a sign, a suspicion, will sometimes suffice to trouble a man subject to this defect, and to make him carry on his face all the signs of his discontent, and his little virtues.
Often that which one day pleases him, on the morrow displeases him; the commencement of a conversation will make him laugh, and the end will put him in bad humor: it is necessary to divine at each instant of the day what will please and what wound him.
There is nothing, even to the means which one takes to give him pleasure and oblige him, which does not serve him for a pretext for being more and more angry and irritated.
A religious susceptible to this point might think to justify his conduct by saying it was his character; but he ought to know that with grace and good will one can easily change his character; that, in religion, we should labor for it constantly; to show too great a sensibility is to make the avowal of little virtue. A religious who has a high opinion of his vocation, and who desires his perfection, accommodates himself to the character of all others, and never claims that others should accommodate themselves to his.
Let us see now what is our conduct in this respect. Have we not listened too much to our sensibility, or rather our self-love and our pride, on occasions when we have experienced some pains and difficulty? Have we not believed too easily that others wished to cause us pain; that others desired to humiliate us, to bring on us disesteem? Have we not murmured when we had something to suffer? Have we not abandoned ourselves to ill humor, to melancholy? Does it not happen to us to assume an air, sullen, gruff, taciturn, disagreeable, as soon as anything annoys or contradicts us? Is it not thus that for trifles we have rendered ourself unhappy; that we have become disgusted with our duties, and that we have become for others an object of scandal and chagrin? Ah, let it no longer be thus henceforth; and for that let us call God to our help, and say to Him with David: It is time, O Lord, to do, to come to my aid, to cast on me looks of mercy, because of my weakness; for up to this moment I have gone astray like a sheep that is lost.—Ps. cxviii. 126, 176.
Pause.
ACT OF CONTRITION.—Who then am I, to be so sensitive, so susceptible? I ought to be well known; for truly the tree is known by its fruits, and if Thou didst permit, O my God, that others should know me as Thou knowest me, where would I go to hide my shame? Pardon me, Lord, all my susceptibilities, the fruit of my pride; pardon me, by the merits of Jesus Christ and the intercession of Mary.
I make the resolution to......