Popular Instructions to Parents

Fr. Girardey published this short book in 1897 as a companion to his instructions on marriage. In eighteen brief chapters he follows a child from the week of baptism to the wedding, and at each stage he tells parents what to do and why. Have the baby baptized within the week. Teach the names of Jesus and Mary first. Keep the children off the streets at night, and make home pleasant enough that the older ones would rather stay in it. Punish without anger, and do not pet the child the moment after. Never take a child’s side against the teacher. Let your daughter receive callers only at home, with you present, and once your children are married, stay out of their affairs.

He is a Redemptorist, and he quotes St. Alphonsus on prayer, on devotion to Mary, on St. Joseph, and on the three Hail Marys morning and night that he recommends for purity. He is also as hard on parents as on children. Kindness without firmness he calls culpable weakness, and firmness without kindness harshness; a house full of scolding, he says, drives the young out at night, and the fault is then the parents’ own.

The instructions end with nineteen prayers for the moments parents dread or hope for: a first communion, a confirmation, a child’s vocation, a son or daughter about to marry, a wayward child, a sick child, a child who has died. An appendix prints the school ordinance of Frederick the Great, an unbeliever who put religion in the first hour of every school day. For parents who want a priest to speak to them without hedging, this is a book to read in an evening and keep within reach.